I made some decent friends here…………..all r phd students. This was not intentional…..i was actually hoping to catch some hip crowd of masters students, go to parties and get a LIFE!!!! But I realized that everywhere in world opposites attract, except in med/bio sciences where like students attract like students.
The more nerdy u r, the more nerdy friend u will get ( nerdy = intelligent, and trust me u want to look nerdy or u will look like a loner, loner = successful bastard/bitch who got lucky with publications – and probably that’s why he/she is happy). Fortunately I look nerdy (I m not loner material) and I make friends quite quickly, but they soon realize it was all pretense on my part and that I m not actually THAT NERDY and they soon abandon me. Luckily I found couple of pretentious nerds around me and we hang out a lot.
But recently we realized that our pretense was turning into reality. I can’t delve into the situation when this realization hit us, or rather hit me……..but I m stunned. I have always considered myself studious not nerdy!!!!! Will have to ask krish abt it, get second opinion and analyze it. Is there a point of return for me or am I doomed forever????
Monday, March 3, 2008
nothingness
well my krish thought my previous blog was BORING.......(just like me -- but he being kind n considerate didn't say 'like you' -- just said its too boring) he thinks i am better at writing textbook answers. At least none of my profs have said that my writing is boring............
the actual funny part is that the one person i listen to seriously is krish - BF. it doesn't necessarily mean that i do things the way he wants them to be done but its a huge accomplishment, just listening to someone else. and i am getting better at it. also him having a nice soothing melodious voice helps a lot -- my ears r not strained (i hate high pitched whines) . and i do actually listen!!!
i might have dyslexia (after watching TZP) or an attention deficit disorder. i just go blank and zone out when people are speaking. for example today in middle of computational dynamics i started thinking abt me and M working in same lab and then me having to kill rats --- rats!!!!!
but the thing is i think a lot abt M -- dont take me wrong.
she dropped a subject coz she was stressed and she fainted. now i am taking twice the number of subjects but me i m never stressed. and occasionally if i scream (which happens only 3 -4 times in a day depending on how many irritating conversations i have) then i m letting off steam. and if i m studying twice as hard then its my indian blood which cant be satisfied with anything less than an A grade. and the indian stamina keeps me from fainting also .i dream of fainting so that i can take a day off -- but fainting happens only in dreams not in my reality. and its my indian sycophancy which make me sweet and amiable towards my profs.
i have to thank India for many things including for krish who thinks i write crap.
well i m just letting off steam!
the actual funny part is that the one person i listen to seriously is krish - BF. it doesn't necessarily mean that i do things the way he wants them to be done but its a huge accomplishment, just listening to someone else. and i am getting better at it. also him having a nice soothing melodious voice helps a lot -- my ears r not strained (i hate high pitched whines) . and i do actually listen!!!
i might have dyslexia (after watching TZP) or an attention deficit disorder. i just go blank and zone out when people are speaking. for example today in middle of computational dynamics i started thinking abt me and M working in same lab and then me having to kill rats --- rats!!!!!
but the thing is i think a lot abt M -- dont take me wrong.
she dropped a subject coz she was stressed and she fainted. now i am taking twice the number of subjects but me i m never stressed. and occasionally if i scream (which happens only 3 -4 times in a day depending on how many irritating conversations i have) then i m letting off steam. and if i m studying twice as hard then its my indian blood which cant be satisfied with anything less than an A grade. and the indian stamina keeps me from fainting also .i dream of fainting so that i can take a day off -- but fainting happens only in dreams not in my reality. and its my indian sycophancy which make me sweet and amiable towards my profs.
i have to thank India for many things including for krish who thinks i write crap.
well i m just letting off steam!
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